Monday 31 March 2014

Why Some Muslim Men Love Khadija and Ayesha

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 I loved this article from this tumblr :) This is an awesome brother mashAllah!

In the past couple of days, I�ve been witness to something that has angered me beyond measure. Some Muslim women started a hashtag on Twitter to talk about their issues. Why Twitter you ask? Well, because women�s issues are only marginally covered in the broader media unless it�s somehow connected to �saving� them or hijab or Femen. Under this hashtag - #IfKhadijaCanDoIt -, they were attempting to talk about the issues and problems facing them in current times.
As you guessed it, some Muslim men attempted to hijack it and infuse it with their own reactionary ideas of how Muslim women should live their lives. Below is a Twitter tirade I had last night that was directed at these men. For the most part, it�s what I tweeted as is, but I have added some new words and edited the tweets because in the heat of my anger, I forgot to type right at times. Here goes:

Dear Certain Muslim Men:

I�m tired and fed up with the double standards you have when it comes to Muslim women.
Why do I sense that there are two Islams for some of us? Why do I feel like the Islam for men is different from the Islam for women? On the one hand, there�s the cosmopolitan, inclusive, open Islam for men. It�s political, spiritual, religious. On the other, we�ve constructed an Islam for women that is only concerned with how they should belong to us in some way - whether as mothers, sisters, daughters or wives.
When we talk about Muslim men�s rights, we talk about everything - employment, immigration, health, education, workplace discrimination, systematic racism, racial profiling, insecurity� you name it, we talk about it. The Islam for men is politically charged. We use it to tackle issues that we face daily in our lives as independent beings with inalienable rights.
However, the Islam we�ve constructed for women serves only one purpose: to train women to be �good� mothers, wives, daughters and sisters. We don�t look at women�s problems in the same way as we do our own. We treat them like they�re far less dire than the hurdles facing us. When women attempt to get us to take them seriously, we patronize them with words like, �This is not as important as X, Y and Z facing the community right now.� As if women don�t have to struggle with issues we do.
We pretend like education, health care, immigration, racism etc� don�t affect them. Like they are only men�s issues. Some of us push hard to stunt their inclusion in our political struggles. When we allow them to join, we tokenize their presence. We�re happy to have them in full hijab, or with purdahs at rallies to show off how accepting of women�s rights we are. We like to talk about it to media. We showcase women in our political struggle, but behind closed doors, we�re just as prejudiced against them as the system that oppresses them.
We ignore that not only do they have to face every single problem we do, but they have to struggle against systemic and systematic misogyny, too, - not to mention far higher levels of sexual violence and almost all the sexual harassment.

Obviously, the worst of us want women to be confined to our houses - their role only to support us physically, spiritually and sexually. However, even among the best of us Muslim men, some treat women only as good as they can serve us in some way. Even when it comes to our political struggle, we include women to raise awareness about issues that are hurting us men, but when it comes to their problems, some of us abandon them. We don�t stand behind their voices. The worst don�t even listen.
Domestic violence? Their problem. 
Lack of access to or cramped spaces and humiliation at mosques? Their problem. 
Sexual harassment? Their problem. 
Sexism at work? Their problem. 
Misrepresentation in the media? Their problem.

If it�s something that pertains to only Muslim women, we pretend like it doesn�t even exist. We�re ready to defend ourselves when some Islamophobic nutjob collectively accuses us of treating Muslim women harshly, but when it comes to Muslim women being treated harshly by others, we don�t even notice. When Muslim women fight with us for our rights, they�re welcome. When it�s their rights, they stand alone. It�s like some Muslim men - even educated, cosmopolitan, �enlightened� men - feel shamed by supporting Muslim women.
But this� this angers me the most. This phrase that gets thrown around by some men when they�re confronted with women who want their rights, �Islam already gives women all the rights she needs.� This. Is. Bull****.

Brothers, when we are beat up by cops in NY, do we say, �Islam already gives men all the rights we need.� ??? Brothers, when our mosques are bugged by the FBI, do we say, �Islam already gives men all the rights we need.� ??? What about when we�re not hired because we�re brown? �Islam already gives men all the rights we need,� ??? No?
Brothers: Why is it that when Muslim men face racism and discrimination, we don�t talk about the prophet�s companions Othman or Omar? Brothers: Why is it that when the police uses violence against us, we don�t talk about Abuzar or Talha? Brothers: Seriously, if Islam is for all time, then why are we not able to see our issues in the prism of 1,400 years ago?
Oh, but just you wait till women�s issues come up. We all suddenly become scholars of early Islamic history.
Brothers, the only thing some of us can tell women is: �Well, just look at Khadija and Ayesha. That should solve your problem.�
Tell me brothers: How can looking at Khadija help a Muslim woman who�s being denied access to education by the state? How does looking at Ayesha help a Muslim who is being sexually harassed on the way to work? How should a Muslim woman who�s being discriminated against at work follow Fatima to solve her problem? You can�t because you and I both know why we use Khadija and Ayesha and Fatima when it comes to women�s issues.
We tell Muslim their problems are solved by women from early Islamic history because they were all housewives.
That�s what some of us want Muslim women to be, brothers. We want them to only serve our needs. Their existence tied to us. We don�t actually want to support Muslim women in their struggle against issues facing them. We just want to one up them while acting smart about it. But to live a life like Khadija or Ayesha, you need to have a husband like Mohammed, which I don�t see any of us being like. Even if Muslim women choose to be housewives - and many do - they�ll still struggle against patriarchy - at home.
The truth is, when some men tell Muslim women they should follow Khadija or Ayesha, what we really mean is: �Follow men.� Guess what: If there was a school in Mecca in 7th century AD, I�m sure Khadija and Ayesha would�ve liked to go to study, too. Muslim women would�ve become nurses, doctors, and teachers, too, if those institutions existed. If all the Muslim women should do is what women in 7th century AD Mecca did, then why are men doing different things?
Why don�t we men take camels up and down the Mecca-Syria trail since that�s what the best Muslim men back then did? Name one male companion of the prophet who was a doctor or an engineer or a college professor. One. (The answer by the way is zero). Better yet, why aren�t we dreaming of becoming sheep herders when we grow up because that�s what the prophet grew up to do.
Why do some Muslim men want to be doctors, engineers and college professors unlike the prophet and his companions? Isn�t this bid�ah and fitnah? But when Muslim women want to teach, or treat patients or design cars some of us start shouting, �KHADIJA! AYESHA! BID�AH! FITNAH!� And best of all: �Islam already gives women all the rights she needs��
You know what that translates to? �Make me food. Suck my d***. Raise my kids.�

The truth is, some of us use Khadija and Ayesha and Fatima�s names to enslave their daughters - nothing more, nothing less. Worse, we use Islam to justify our own inadequacies, our own prejudices and our own misogyny and contempt for women. No, Islam doesn�t give women all the rights they need because some of these rights didn�t even exist back then. There were no constitutions, no social contracts and no inalienable rights.
That�s why Islam isn�t the be all end all for us men and our problems and rights in contemporary society. That�s why our banners decrying racial profiling by New York Police Department don�t include the words, �Islam already gives us all the rights we need. Please continue to oppress us because we�re very happy.�

So what is the solution? How can we men help? Here�s a revolutionary idea: listen to Muslim women.
Muslim women know their problems and the solutions to them. They�re working on it. All they need from us is support. They�re fighting against the system denying them their rights and you know, their issues are too complex for a guy - like me and you - to understand on our own. We have to learn - from them. After they�ve made us understand, we have to ask them how we can support them. Not support them the way we would like to.
Most of all, we men shouldn�t try to come up with answers: Muslim women already have most of them and are working on the rest. Our job is when women come out to implement their solutions to stand behind them or beside them. Not in front of them. They�re already in the trenches for their rights and for solving their issues. They need amplification of their voices not obstruction. We can stand with them against the state, the religious establishment, even our own brothers - just like they stand with us when our rights are at stake. Or we can ignore them, but even ignoring them - at this critical juncture - is better than beating the Khadija and Ayesha drum.
Not only does it demean Khadija and Ayesha and show our contempt for women, it also gives the system extra ammunition to oppress women. After all, if Muslim men don�t want women to have their rights, why should the states care?

Finally, next time someone asks you why you�re speaking for women�s rights or joining their rallies, tell them because:

"If one of you sees something wrong, let him change it with his hand; if he cannot, then with his tongue; if he cannot, then with his heart and this is the weakest faith." - Prophet Mohammed (PBUH)

Saturday 29 March 2014

Why was Mukhtar Abbas Naqvi so angry over Sabir Ali's induction in BJP!

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After former Janata Dal (U) leader Sabir Ali joined BJP, there was a near-hysteric reaction from Mukhtar Abbas Naqvi.

Naqvi, who is the vice-president of the BJP, tweeted about Sabir Ali's 'terrorist' connection.

He inferred that if things continue this way, then Dawood [Ibrahim] may also be allowed to join the party.

It was surprising as Naqvi, 56, has rarely reacted with such intensity before. With his reaction, he publicly embarrassed the party too.

So what was the reason? Was it a feeling of insecurity that prompted him to target the party leadership for induction of Sabir Ali. Naqvi is the most prominent face of the Bharatiya Janta Party (BJP).

The party has had tremendous difficulty finding 'Muslim faces' in the past. That he belonged to UP, once the most polarised state during the Ram Mandir movement, was an advantage to him and the BJP too gave him enough importance.

When no Muslim leader worth his salt associated himself with it, Naqvi was a proud BJP worker.
Muslims openly expressed their dislike for the man who was in BJP when its leaders [Kalyan Singh, Vinay Katiyar, Uma Bharti] were more harsh on minorities and less 'polished' than today's BJP.

Once he managed to win from Rampur Loksabha constituency too. The second Muslim face, Shahnawaz Khan, who has represented Kishanganj (Bihar) in the Lok Sabha, is much junior. It is only a few years back that Najma Heptullah joined the party.

More Muslim leaders began joining the BJP. MJ Akbar is the latest entrant. For long, Mukhtar Abbas Naqvi enjoyed a unique position in the party. He was regarded and rewarded by the party. Even for the RSS, the dhoti-clad, Mukhtar, who often sported tilak on forehead, was quite close to the ideal Muslim as per their definition.

But now, with the purported Narendra Modi wave, and when there is a feeling that BJP may emerge as the largest party and form the government, everyone is flocking towards the party. Sabir Ali may not be a big leader but he is quite articulate, even speaks English and has a 'rustic charm', as certain BJP leaders said.

Also, Ali at least has some support among a section of Muslims in Bihar. Clearly, Naqvi must have felt insecure. For decades, he worked hard, faced all sort of criticism and condemnation, even abuses from members of the community, and when the party appears close to forming the government at the Centre, all these guys who have made no sacrifices, are joining the party & stealing the limelight!

They may also become contenders in the hierarchy, as senior office-bearers or even ministers. Isn't it unjust? A friend remarked, 'Mehnat kare Murgi, Anda Khaye faqir'. No wonder, Mukhtar was so much upset that he shot off the tweet. We do understand your pain, Mukhtar Bhai. We really do. Aap logo.n ka kya khyaal hai?

Thursday 27 March 2014

Tuesday 25 March 2014

Monday 24 March 2014

Of Aisha�s age at marriage

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IT is said that Hazrat Aisha was six years old when her nikah was performed with Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) in Makkah, and nine years old when she moved in to live with her husband in Madina after Hijra.
This piece of misinformation has led to the wrong view that child marriage has the sanction of Islam. It must be noted that establishing the authenticity of hadiths, the narrators� circumstances and the conditions at that time have to be correlated with historical facts. There is only one hadith by Hisham which suggests the age of Hazrat Aisha as being nine when she came to live with her husband.
Many authentic hadiths also show that Hisham�s narration is incongruous with several historical facts about the Prophet�s life, on which there is consensus. With reference to scholars such as Umar Ahmed Usmani, Hakim Niaz Ahmed and Habibur Rehman Kandhulvi, I would like to present some arguments in favour of the fact that Hazrat Aisha was at least 18 years old when her nikah was performed and at least 21 when she moved into the Prophet�s house to live with him.
According to Umar Ahmed Usmani, in Surah Al-Nisa, it is said that the guardian of the orphans should keep testing them, until they reach the age of marriage, before returning their property (4:6). From this scholars have concluded that the Quran sets a minimum age of marriage which is at least puberty. Since the approval of the girl has a legal standing, she cannot be a minor.
Hisham bin Urwah is the main narrator of this hadith. His life is divided into two periods: in 131A.H. the Madani period ended, and the Iraqi period started, when Hisham was 71 years old. Hafiz Zehbi has spoken about Hisham�s loss of memory in his later period. His students in Madina, Imam Malik and Imam Abu Hanifah, do not mention this hadith. Imam Malik and the people of Madina criticised him for his Iraqi hadiths.
All the narrators of this hadith are Iraqis who had heard it from Hisham. Allama Kandhulvi says that the words spoken in connection with Hazrat Aisha�s age were tissa ashara, meaning 19, when Hisham only heard (or remembered), tissa, meaning nine. Maulana Usmani thinks this change was purposely and maliciously made later.
Historian Ibn Ishaq in his Sirat Rasul Allah has given a list of the people who accepted Islam in the first year of the proclamation of Islam, in which Hazrat Aisha�s name is mentioned as Abu Bakr�s �little daughter Aisha�. If we accept Hisham�s calculations, she was not even born at that time.
Some time after the death of the Prophet�s first wife, Hazrat Khadija, Khawla suggested to the Prophet that he get married again, to a bikrun, referring to Hazrat Aisha (Musnad Ahmed). In Arabic bikrun is used for an unmarried girl who has crossed the age of puberty and is of marriageable age. The word cannot be used for a six-year-old girl.
Some scholars think that Hazrat Aisha was married off so early because in Arabia girls mature at an early age. But this was not a common custom of the Arabs at that time. According to Allama Kandhulvi, there is no such case on record either before or after Islam. Neither has this ever been promoted as a Sunnah of the Prophet. The Prophet married off his daughters Fatima at 21 and Ruquiyya at 23. Besides, Hazrat Abu Bakr, Aisha�s father, married off his eldest daughter Asma at the age of 26.
Hazrat Aisha narrates that she was present on the battlefield at the Battle of Badar (Muslim). This leads one to conclude that Hazrat Aisha moved into the Prophet�s house in 1 A.H. But a nine-year-old could not have been taken on a rough and risky military mission.
In 2 A.H, the Prophet refused to take boys of less than 15 years of age to the battle of Uhud. Would he have allowed a 10-year-old girl to accompany him? But Anas reported that he saw Aisha and Umme Sulaim carrying goatskins full of water and serving it to the soldiers (Bukhari). Umme Sulaim and Umme Ammara, the other women present at Uhud, were both strong, mature women whose duties were the lifting of the dead and injured, treating their wounds, carrying water in heavy goatskins, supplying ammunition and even taking up the sword.
Hazrat Aisha used the kunniat, the title derived from the name of a child, of Umme Abdullah after her nephew and adopted son. If she was six when her nikah was performed, she would have been only eight years his senior, hardly making him eligible for adoption. Also, a little girl could not have given up on ever having her own child and used an adopted child�s name for her kunniat.
Hazrat Aisha�s nephew Urwah once remarked that he was not surprised about her amazing knowledge of Islamic law, poetry and history because she was the wife of the Prophet and the daughter of Abu Bakr. If she was eight when her father migrated, when did she learn poetry and history from him?
There is consensus that Hazrat Aisha was 10 years younger than her elder sister Asma, whose age at the time of the hijrah, or migration to Madina, was about 28. It can be concluded that Hazrat Aisha was about 18 years old at migration. On her moving to the Prophet�s house, she was a young woman at 21. Hisham is the single narrator of the hadith whose authenticity is challenged, for it does not correlate with the many historical facts of the time.

Thursday 20 March 2014

A Woman's Love, A Prophet's Promise

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Pls read full post at the excellent Salafi Feminist blog: 

A Warrior�s Spirit

Nusaybah bint Ka'b, Umm �Imarah al-Ansariyyah was another sahabiyyah whose love for Rasul Allah (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) resulted in a unique relationship that has been immortalised in the seerah.
Initially a nurse, Umm �Imarah was present at the battlefield of Uhud when the rumour began to spread that Rasul Allah had been killed. Amidst the fleeing of Muslim soldiers, Umm �Imarah lifted her sword and sought out the Prophet (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) for herself. When she found him, she placed herself firmly in front of him and began to defend him with a strength and courage to rival that of the male companions.
The power of her love was such that when her son was gravely injured, she didn�t even stop until Rasul Allah (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) told her to attend to him. �From where can anyone get courage like you, O Umm 'Imarah?�
It is narrated that the Prophet said that in whichever direction he turned in the battlefield, he could see her defending and protecting him. Admiring the ferocity of her devotion, Rasul Allah (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) invoked Allah's blessings on Umm �Imarah�s family and prayed that they should be his friends in Paradise as well.
After the Battle of Uhud, Umm �Imarah wielded her sword on the battlefields of Yamamah and Hunayn and was present at the Treaty of Hudaybiyyah. She also took part in the second pledge of �Aqabah.

However, Umm �Imarah�s relationship with the Messenger of Allah was not restricted to the battlefield. It is also due to her questioning that the famous verse of Surah al-Ahzab, verse 35, was revealed. 
Umm �Imarah al-Ansariyyah said that she went to the Prophet (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) and said to him: "I feel that everything is for men. Women are not mentioned as having anything!� Verse 35 of Surah al-Ahzab was then sent down. 
(The Hadith is narrated by at-Tirmidhi under No. 3211, and is in Sahih at-Tirmidhi under No. 2565)

These stories are examples of how Rasul Allah (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) interacted with the women of his Ummah, inspiring their love for him and their dedication to Islam. His dealings with the sahabiyyaat were full of dignity and respect, acknowledging their sacrifices and their talents. He valued them as much as any male companion and never, for a moment, doubted their sincerity or their worth.

In turn, the sahabiyyat loved him fiercely. Not as a husband or a father, but as the Messenger of Allah: the person who had brought them the message of Islam, the truth that purified their souls, the only path that would lead them to their Lord and Creator. It was Muhammad (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) who taught them about Allah, who told them about Paradise and its beauty and its reward, who warned them against Hell and its torments.

It was for the sake of Allah and His Messenger that the Sahabiyyaat transformed their lives and sacrificed their health and wealth, dedicating their lives to the promise delivered by Rasul Allah (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam):

{Indeed, the Muslim men and Muslim women, the believing men and believing women, the obedient men and obedient women, the truthful men and truthful women, the patient men and patient women, the humble men and humble women, the charitable men and charitable women, the fasting men and fasting women, the men who guard their private parts and the women who do so, and the men who remember Allah often and the women who do so - for them Allah has prepared forgiveness and a great reward.} (Al-Ahzab:35)

Monday 17 March 2014

Lower Your Gaze Quotes

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Commonly we hear about the Hijab of Women that is modest dressing and covering their Aurah but do you know there is also a Hijab for men In Islam and that Hijab is Lowering your gaze. Islam tells men to lower their gaze and not to stare at women. It will protect them from doing haram deeds.

Here are some awesome Lower Your Gaze Quotes:













Rights of and Obligations on a Widow

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It is surely one of the greatest sorrows to loose a husband. Husbands have been made guardians of their wives. When a women becomes widow, she bears a loss that cannot be counted. Loosing husband means loosing a life partner, the better half. Husband provides for his wife. It is his duty to feed her, cloth her, look after her and above all, love her. When a person who dutifully loves you leaves you, it is indeed hard to bear.


There are certain things that a widow is ordered to do. And there are certain things, that people should do with the widow. First, we will see what should a widow do after her husband's death. Allah swt say in Quran;
[002:234] The surviving widows of the deceased among you, must remain unmarried for a period of four months and ten days. After they complete their (prescribed) term (they are free to decide their future); you bear no sin for anything they do with themselves in an accepted manner. Allah is well aware of everything you do. 
Four months and ten days in the mourning time period for a muslim lady who widowed. It is the rule Allah swt has revealed. Of course, there is more to it. According to the scholars, this is the time period safe to see if the women conceives. And it is the time period after which she is free to marry anyone. Thus, islam has put a safe limit of time for the women and the husband's family to see if there is any chance of an offspring to come. Of course, of spring belongs to his father's family. Then there is the mourning element also in this time period. After the iddah, the woman is free to get married and lead her life with another man in a wedlock. Allah swt say in Quran;
[002:235] You bear no sin if you drop a hint to those (widowed) women of marriage proposal, or keep (such thoughts) to yourself. Allah knows that naturally you would think about them. But do not engage in a secret tryst; do not go beyond uttering the generally recognized remark. Definitely, do not contract (or consummate) marriage in secret before the prescribed period of waiting is over. Know it (for sure) that indeed Allah knows whatever is in your heart. So fear Him, and know (for sure) that Allah is the most Forgiving and the most Merciful. 
In pagan arab, and still in the pagan world, when a woman used to become widow, she used to lead a life of misery. She was not allowed to wear clean dress. She was not allowed to live in a clean place, instead, she used to live in the dirties, or oldest corner of the house. But islam abolished all these pagan practices. Islam gave widows, their due right to lead their life happily, and islam told women that they could live a better life even after they became widow. Then there is the rule in islam that if a women is left behind and her husband knows that it is a death travel, then this is what he should do and leave for her;
[002:240] Those among you who face death and leave behind widows, should bequeath to them the living expenses for (at least) a year, as well as the residence. (However) you bear no sin if they leave on their own, to pursue whatever they want in an accepted manner. Allah is Almighty, and all-Wise.
Following hadith is the explanation of this verse.

Bukhari, volume 7, Book 63, Number 256:

Narrated Mujahid:
(regarding the Verse): 'If any of you dies and leaves wives behind,' That was the period of the 'Iddah which the widow was obliged to spend in the house of the late husband. Then Allah revealed: And those of you who die and leave wives should bequeath for their wives a year's maintenance and residence without turning them out, but if they leave, there is no blame on you for what they do of themselves, provided it is honorable (i.e. lawful marriage) (2.240) Mujahid said: Allah has ordered that a widow has the right to stay for seven months and twenty days with her husband's relatives through her husband's will and testament so that she will complete the period of one year (of 'Iddah). But the widow has the right to stay that extra period or go out of her husband's house as is indicated by the statement of Allah: 'But if they leave there is no blame on you,... ' (2.240) Ibn 'Abbas said: The above Verse has cancelled the order of spending the period of the 'Iddah at her late husband's house, and so she could spend her period of the 'Iddah wherever she likes. And Allah says: 'Without turning them out.' 'Ata said: If she would, she could spend her period of the 'Iddah at her husband's house, and live there according to her (husband's) will and testament, and if she would, she could go out (of her husband's house) as Allah says: 'There is no blame on you for what they do of themselves.' (2.240) 'Ata added: Then the Verses of inheritance were revealed and the order of residence (for the widow) was cancelled, and she could spend her period of the 'Iddah wherever she would like, and she was no longer entitled to be accommodated by her husband's family. 
Widow is not left alone in islam, as she is left alone in other religions. Islam has made it obligatory that a widow should be given her due right in her husband's property. The following verse explains it;
[004:012] Your share is half of what your wives leave behind, provided they have no child. If they have children, then your share is a quarter of what they leave behind, after paying off any legacy bequeathed, and debt incurred. Your widows� share is a quarter of what you leave behind, provided you have no children. But if you have children, then their share is an eighth of what you leave behind, after paying off any legacy bequeathed, and debt incurred. If the deceased  man or woman  is not survived by any children or parent, but has a brother and a sister, then each of them would inherit a sixth. Should there be more than two (siblings), then they shall share equally in a third, after paying any legacy bequeathed, and debts incurred. (Let there be) no harm (to the heirs). These are instructions from Allah! And Allah is all-Aware, and the most Forbearing! 
Compare the rights of a widow with the obligations put on her, and you will see that islam has given so many rights to a women in any state. While most people think a widow is nothing but a lost person, islam re assures her that she is not lost. And she is not alone. Even her financial needs are assured in islam. Unfortunately, the current muslim societies do not recognize their rights, rather they only focus on what should a widow do. They do not understand that helping out a widow is a deed of huge reward as explained in the following hadith.

Bukhari, Volume 8, Book 73, Number 35:

Narrated Safwan bin Salim:
The Prophet said "The one who looks after and works for a widow and for a poor person, is like a warrior fighting for Allah's Cause or like a person who fasts during the day and prays all the night." Narrated Abu Huraira that the Prophet said as above. 
If these benefits and order of Allah swt are considered seriously, our women will never feel alone and weak. May Allah swt guide us all. Amin.

Tips For Muslim Couples For Successful Married Life

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Marriage Is the most sacred bond between two people. This bond unites two people and two families in a bond which can both be full of happiness and full of miseries. Once marriage is done, then comes the real challenges the both husband and wife has to face. Mostly, the early time period of married life is relatively easy because both husband and wife start a relationship which is, at the start, full of love and joy. But with the passage of time, as both of them start to know each other, this relationship takes multiple turns and twists.


The key point is to survive wisely. Even parents and siblings have fights and conflicts, but in the end, these relations survive because they know each other's importance and place in life. Similarly, husband and wife need to know each other's importance. Below are given few points which prove to be helpful in a successful marriage.

1: The first and the most important point is to respect each other. Every relationship needs respect. If two people cannot respect each other, there will grow no love between them. So, the first thing is to respect.

2: Then comes love. When two people get married, they agree to obey the commands of Allah swt with regard to marriage. Islam teaches us to love others for the sake of Allah. Wife and husband need this love more than others. It is because their relationship rests upon agreement to live as per the order of Allah swt.

3: Learn to listen. When one person wants to talk, give him/her space to express her/his point of view. Most couples fight because they don't listen. Our religion also tell us to be respectful to others. And this respect and sense of care is more than ever needed in marriage.

4: Disagreements do not mean end of the world. People fight, but fighting does not mean crossing the limits. So when disagreement occurs, intend to keep quite rather than talk back.

Wife needs to obey her husband. Prophet Muhammad pbuh said that � if prostration was permissible for a man, I would order wives to prostrate before their husbands�. This is the status of husband. But this does not give husbands undue importance over women. Our beloved prophet Muhammad pbuh used to love all His wives so much. Umahatul momineen told us and left with us so much on how prophet Muhammad pbuh used to treat them. His love for Ayesha r.a. is not a secret.

Sometimes, it so happens that both or one of them cannot feel attracted towards the other. Or, with the passage of time, the attraction fades away. What should be done in such a situation? The answer is, do not wait for the other better half to take the first step towards you. instead, take the first step yourself. Never involve anyone else in your personal matters. Mostly, family members play important part in breaking marriages because, girl's parents want to believe that their daughter is right, while the boy's parents only believe that their son is right. And mostly, nothing wise comes from such involvement.

Marriage is the institution to ensure human race. It is the halal way for the progress of society. It is the God gifted relationship to share love, respect and care from the other person. Life partners are called better halves. Try to keep your other half happy and you yourself will be happy. This is the simple rule with is reflected by the rules and regulations set by Islam with regards to marriage. 

UFOs and space crafts as mentioned in Quran

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Aliens, UFOs, space crafts and secret areas etc. are a common talk now a days. In fact, even in old ages, there are signs found that direct the researchers and scientists towards some other beings that visited earth from other places of universe. What ever the truth is only known to Allah swt alone. But it does not mean that islam has not talked about these beings. Just like cloning is mentioned in Quran �aliens� also are mentioned in Quran.


Allah swt has said on many places in Quran that He swt has created seven heaven and seven earths one upon the other. Does this mean there are other places like our earth in universe? It could very much be. Because, Allah swt has not mentioned anything in Quran without any purpose of quoting it. There were many things in Quran that were not understood some time ago. But with passage of time, things became clearer and what looked simple thing contained many meanings in it. This is why Allah swt has revealed Quran in arabic. Arabic is the only language which is richest. Even a word in arabic can describe a whole sentence and can deliver a much deeper meaning. This is the miracle of Quran. Coming to the UFOs again, Allah swt say in Quran
"And among His Signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the living creatures that He has scattered through them: and He has power to gather them together when He wills. (The Noble Quran, 42:29)"
In this noble verse, Allah swt tell us about His signs. Now, first thing, the signs of Allah swt are spread in this universe. Like, mountains, oceans, the tiniest and the largest creations. The life in different shapes, kinds, and sizes, the environment and some very strange secrets like the barmoda triangle. All these are His signs, which enable us to think that all this complexity fashioned into strangest arrangement of simplicity Is not some thing happened by chance. But there is some one there who has not only created all this but is also running the system. So, the verse quoted about also talks about signs. And these signs include heavens and earth. And then Allah swt say that his sign is the living creatures that He has scattered through them. Now, we know some of the creations of Allah swt. But this verse says that Allah swt has scattered the living creatures �through� them, i.e. the heavens and earth.

This means there are not just us, living on earth but some one else is also there. Now, most people will argue that it is about angels. Angels are exiting much longer than us. In fact, before humans jin used to reside on earth. Then we came. And before jin, angels were there on heavens. So it is not about angels but there are some creatures. Then, the following verse contains something which has a very deep meaning in it;
Praise be to Allah, the Cherisher and Sustainer of the Worlds  (1:1) 
The word �worlds� means not just one or two words, but many worlds. Another thing is that world or alam is the word used for the place where some one exists. We exist on earth so this is world, or world. This verse makes it simple and clear to understand that there are worlds. And those worlds are also run by Allah swt. Just like we worship Him, there are others who also worship Him. So, this verse, the very first verse of Quran tells us that we are not the only one but there are others. The following verse of Quran says;
"O ye assembly of Jinns and men! If it be ye can pass beyond the zones of the heavens and the earth, pass ye! not without authority shall ye be able to pass! (The Noble Quran, 55:33)"
This verse, tells us that going beyond earth is not an impossible thing. And we know it today. Many space ships have gone outside earth for exploration purposes. But again, Allah swt say that no one can leave the folds of earth with out authority, i.e. the will of Allah swt. And this is also evident that very many space missions could not fail to leave earth because of an end time error. So, it is not an impossible thing to leave earth. But it was impossible at the time when Quran was revealed. No body at that time could think about leaving earth in a plane. But still, the Miraj happened. And today, scientists prove and actually agree that the travel of Miraj happened. So it means that just like we can leave our earth, there are others who can leave there place or we can reach them when and if Allah's will.

To conclude, we need to think that those who are searching for other lives and for places like earth have something in their heads. This idea of other beings is not just an idea, it is backed by some knowledge. And of course, all the knowledge belongs to Allah swt. 

Jinn and The Myths Related to Them

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Who are Jinn� what they are� where are they from� what they do? How they live etc etc are the questions which almost every person wants to know. Since, jinn are a creature other than human beings with very distinct characteristics, and they cannot be seen, so they are perceived as something very strange and dangerous. People fear them, and since they cannot see them, so they have associated many false and weird stories with them. Let us see what Quran say about them;


[015:027] And We had earlier fashioned jinn from a hot sultry flame! 
This verse tells us two things. One is that jinn are created from fire. And second is that they were created before us, the humans. Thus, jinn are not aliens or came from mars, but they are a creature who were created before us.

Jinn also have communities just like us. They are muslims, kuffar and belong to different religions. Its not that they are totally out of the world things. It is mentioned in tafsir ibn kathir, that long before the creation of man, jinn used to live on earth. Shetan is also a jin and angels took him. They found him crying and alone on earth, he was very beautiful. So they took him to heavens and raised him there. It is also mentioned in tafsir ibn kathir that shaitan was sent on earth to fight the jinn who created fitnah on earth is a decisive battle. Allahu alam.

Prophet Suleman a.s. Was given the authority over all things of the world, including jinn. He a.s. Was the most powerful king ever witnessed by earth. Thus, it is clear that humans have ruled jinn and they can rule them. So, this clarifies some of the myths about the power and magical characteristics of jinn. Jinn are a creature with their own significance. Just like us, we are also a magical creature for them, far superior and far better. This is why satan chose to disobey Allah swt over prostrating before Adam a.s. Allah swt has mentioned about jinn on mny places in Quran. It is also mentioned that there are jinn who are friends of satan. And these are the jinns, who are worshipped by people. Let us see some verses from Quran;
[006:130] (Allah will say), �Oh the species of jinn and humans! Had the messengers from among your own kind not come to you? And (did they not) recite to you My revelations, and warn you about the meeting of this very day?� They will say, �(Yes, and) we bear witness against ourselves.� The life of this world deceived them, and they will bear witness that they were indeed the unbelievers. 
This verse tells us that just like us, jin also had messengers who brought them the message of truth and wisdom from Allah swt.
[007:179] In fact, We have doomed to hell many of the jinn and the humans. They have a brain, but with it they fail to think. They have eyes but they do not use them to see (the truth). They have ears but they fail to hear (the truth) with them. They are (just) like cattle; in fact they are worse. Such are the heedless ones! 
This verse tell so that jinn can also think like humans. Now what their capabilities are is not entirely know. They have some gifts just like us. But one thing is clear that we have some qualities which they do not have at all. So, both jin and humans both will be judged according to their deeds in this world. When prophet Muhammad pbuh was given the divine message to preach, jinn also took advantage of it and accepted islam as mentioned in this verse;
[046:029] And recall the time (oh Muhammad, SAW) when We turned a small group of jinn towards you to hear the Qur�an (being recited). As they came closer, they said (to each other), �Be quiet and listen attentively.� When the recitation ended they went back to their people to warn them.
Thus, jinn can think and they can do dawah. It is only that we do not know their domain and their mode of work. We are two different creatures. Just like a bad person can harm us, a bad jin can harm us. Just like we fear a bad person some of us fear bad jin. But it does not mean that one should associate superficiality to the creatures of Allah swt. Our religion is based on reasoning. And the biggest reason we can see is our own self. If we can only explain ourselves, that is when we can raise questions about other things.  

Sadaqah In Islam In Light of Quran

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Sadaqah is the voluntary charity in the name of Allah swt. The literal meaning of sadaqah is the sincerity of faith on part of the one who gives it. The root word of sadaqah is sidq, which means sincerity. Islam encourages to give charity. The main purpose of giving charity is the safe guard of the society. This safe guard includes all side, from finance to morals.


Most people think that sadaqah and zakah are the same things. But they are two different things. Zakaah is the obligation on every muslim who can meets a certain financial threshold. While sadaqah is not obligation. It is just like fard namaz and nafal namaz. Both acts earn us reward but one is obligatory and the other is not.

Sadaqah and zakah are different in another way as well. Zakaah can not be given to those who can earn and able bodied and rich. Zakaah is the share of those who are too poor and needy. While sadaqah has no bounds like this. Sadaqah can be given to both rich and poor. Since, sadaqah is the show of sincerity in faith by sharing some thing from us with others, so it does not restrict us to be given only to poors and needy. Sharing increases mutual bonds and love. So sharing is encouraged in islam.

Another difference between sadaqah and zakat is that zakah cannot be given to descendants or ascendants like children to grand children or parents or grand parents. But sadaqah can be given to them. Since these immediate relations come under the responsibility, so they should be fed with and their needs need to be fulfilled as per the requirement of deen. Another difference between sadaqah and zakaat is that zakaat cannot be given to the mushrikeen and kuffar. But sadaqah can be given to non muslims. It is because of the very nature of the two.

Sadaqah is of many types. Even a smile towards parents is counted as sadaqah. A date given to some one with the intention of charity is sadaqah.  Al-Bukhaari said in his Saheeh: �Chapter: every good deed is a charity� then he narrated from Jaabir ibn �Abd-Allaah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: �Every good deed is a charity.�

Every good deed that we do, which reflects us sincerity in faith is sadaqah. This hadith shows that sadaqah is not just that financial benefit but it is the moral benefit of the society as well. If every believer acts upon this one golden rule, then there will remain no more evil in the society. But nothing can be made a standard until it is adopted at individual level.

A very unfortunate thing about our society Is that zakah and sadaqah are thought to be two lowly things that cannot be accepted with open heart. This is very unfortunate because people think, only poor and low people are to be given charity. This is the very ignorance of the muslims of today's age which has made this beautiful share of wealth and possession as a lowly thing. Today, when some one wants to announce something is given in sadaqah, people do not accept anything from it. The common misconception about sadaqah is that it diverts evil. So what diverts evil is not good at all. This ignorance and non sense is really making people avoid giving anything in charity.

The need of the hour is to promote the trend of charity. Today, we are in no short of needy and poor around us. Just look beyond your house's outer wall and you will find people who are really in need of help. Our charity, no matter what kind of it is, can solve their problems. Even a careful ear to someone's problems is sadaqah. So if we listen to a muslim's problem and give him the correct idea or solution, even this will serve as sadaqah. If a good deed like smiling is sadaqah, then how can an edible item, some money or clothing un acceptable. The true meaning of sadaqah need to be spread in the society for its own betterment. 

Importance Of Self Grooming

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Life is the biggest blessing of Allah swt. While most people think life is a single chance, but this is such an amazing that that though this life, we are given the status of crown of creatures. We are given multiple chances in the single life to be good. We are given a way through which we can acquire Allah's blessings, His pleasure, His happiness and His rewards.


Islam is not just a religion but a complete way of life. It is not just about worshipping and earning rewards, like most people think it is, but it is much more than this. One aspect of life which most people don't even know is that islam is the only religion which emphasises greatly on self grooming and self up grading. In fact, the more a person is groomed, the better muslim he is. By self grooming, we do not mean to do fashion and lead a life with no goal. In islam, self grooming and self concept is a very different and very interesting thing.

Who does not want to be good? Who does not want to sound good and who does not want to be known as good. Islam has the easiest solution for all of this. When this world is full of superficiality and materialism, islam tells us to be original. In this world, all that is missing is originality. Islam knows, and only islam knows how to be original.

Islam tells us how to talk, walk, live, sleep, work, eat and every thing that is about us. Allah swt tells us to be polite in our talk. And that is what is liked by all of us. We all like the soft spoken people. Soft speech does not only make the speaker sound reasonable, but such a person is never denied his right of speech. Such a person can make his point better than those who shout. Islam tell us to be humble on earth, to never walk proudly on earth. Humbleness is the most loved quality. While proud people are never considered. Humble people get along with every one easily, while proud people never get along with people and they also do not leave a good image on others.


Islam tells us to be moderate in our life affairs, ike eating, sleeping etc. most people are disliked solely because they have no public manners. Islam tells us what to do when we yawn. Islam tells us what to do when we cough. Islam tells us what to do when we sneeze and islam tells us what to say when some one else sneezes before us. Thus, islam gives us a complete package of public manners. Islam tells us not to be loud in any thing. Islam actually teaches us how to be simple yet impressive. This is what counts the most.

We all want to be the muslim who is followed and because of who people accept islam and practice it more and more. What else could be a dream of a believer than this. So, islam gives us a chance to be an ideal muslim for the society we are living in and ideal personality for every one around us. Those who are good with others, and who leave a really nice and original image on others, they are the ones who are going to be in the hereafter. Because such people do not only please their Lord, but they also become a source of happiness for Others. There is a sahih hadith that says that when Allah swt loves some one, He puts the love for his man in angels, and eventually in the hearts of His men on earth. Thus, for a good person, every thing end up good. Allah swt say in Quran;
[003:015] Say, �Shall I tell you about something (far) better than that? For the righteous ones, there exists with their Lord the gardens of paradise, through which run the rivers. There, the believers shall have eternal abodes, immaculate mates, and the acceptance and approval of Allah. And Allah (vigilantly) watches over His created servants.�
For believers, the reward is Allah's love and His jannah. And to be a believer, worship is not enough, we have to be good in every walk of life.
 
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